Tuesday, January 25, 2011

CLASS OF NUKE 'EM HIGH (1986)

"God bless America...limp dick!"
 
Whenever I watch a Troma movie (and thank Satan that's not very often) the only thing that I can think of the entire movie is "Somebody got paid actual money to write this shit?!".  I'm obviously not the target audience for whatever this movie is.

CLASS OF NUKE 'EM HIGH is about a high school next to a leaky nuclear plant in New Jersey. The ooze and radiation causes the students to start mutating with the expected results. For such an promising set up, the movie is a massive letdown mainly due to the fact it looks so goddamn shitty!  It'd probably make a better novel. Also there's way too much time wasted on the normal crappy Troma one-liners and corny humor.

CONEH is better than the stuff Troma would make later on, but it's still shit. The acting is over the top, the violence is silly, the nudity is lame, the special effects are terrible.

Skip it.

Part 2 - Class of Nuke 'em High Part II: Subhumanoid Meltdown (1991)
Part 3 - Class of Nuke 'em High Part 3: The Good, the Bad and the Subhumanoid (1994)
Part 4 - Return to Nuke 'em High Volume 1 (2013)
Part 5 - Return to Return to Nuke 'em High aka Vol. 2 (2017)